Consumer Concern

The following is a letter I wrote today to the good people at Bobbi Brown (the makeup chick, not the music guy). I’ll let you know if/how they respond.
65 Bleecker Street
Ninth Floor
New York, New York 10012
     Re:  Lasting Impressions
To Whom It May Concern:
       A few weeks ago, while out of town on special business, I realized that I forgot to pack my makeup kit. I can’t go anywhere without it, so I was in quite a bind. At first I decided to just go to the drugstore and try to inexpensively replicate the products that I’d left behind, but after one quick application in my car’s rear view mirror, I realized that I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t live with myself or present myself to my public if I wore cheap makeup.
       It wasn’t just that the stuff looked like garbage on my skin and the lipstick tasted like a curious blend of petroleum jelly and crayons. No. More upsetting was just knowing that I was wearing cheap stuff, the kind that rebellious teens slip into their backpacks on wacky after-school dares.
       I decided there was only one solution: to buy better stuff. So I nearly broke the speed barrier dashing to the nearest Bloomingdale’s, where I was confronted with more choices than a debutante at her cotillion. What to do, what to do?
       I’ll tell you what to do: Pass by my pedestrian Prescriptives. Eschew Estee Lauder. And bop on over to Bobbi Brown.
       I did. And I spent more money than I probably should have. But I figured it was worth it, because I’d read all about it in Allure, Marie Claire, and other “fashion” magazines.
       Let me just tell you: I love the Lip Tint, in Maple. Luscious enough to slather onto pancakes. And the Creamy Concealer, in Bisque. Dreamier than the lobster version. Equally fabulous are the Creamy Eye Pencil, in Dark Brown, and the Cream Blush Stick, in Tawny.
       I do have one problem, though: The words “Bobbi Brown” have all but disappeared from the products’ containers. After only two weeks of use, I could barely make out half of one “B” and the “w” on the blush stick. And forget about the Concealer. The lettering is completely gone.
       Your products are wonderful. The counter girl was a doll. But I have to tell you that I’m not going to buy Bobbi Brown products in the future if the lettering is going to wear off so readily. I bought Bobbi Brown to enhance not only my looks but to enhance my social standing. But what good is it doing if, when I’m applying my makeup in the ladies room at Nobu, no one can tell it apart from Revlon or Maybelline?