I am not a call girl

To The 27 People Who Have Called Me Today:
Stop calling me already. Stop using the phone to reach me. You should know by now that I rarely, if ever, pick up the phone. Even if I recognize your number on the Caller ID, chances are I’m just not going to pick it up. If you really want to get in touch with me, send me email. I’ll respond immediately.
I ordinarily don’t wear T-shirts, but you’re forcing me to reconsider.