A Smidge on Midge

While doing some pressing online research on the “Midge” doll (she’s like Rhoda to Barbie’s Mary), I came across a page listing a vintage Midge for sale. This particular doll, the listing notes, has been “well played with”. But apparently, from the description, perhaps all was not play … and all was not well:

She does have a nick on her lower chin and her breast points are somewhat indented. She is also missing a pinky finger on one of her hands. Still in very nice condition and her clothing hides imperfections.

A nick on the chin? That’s fine. I will not question its cause. (She was probably asking for it.) A missing pinky finger? Perhaps an overzealous play session. Or, a curious child, having just learned of the starfish’s ability to regenerate, decided to see if a doll shared that ability. I am willing to forgive this experiment, given that my sister once hacked her Bert puppet’s tuft of hair and was later dismayed to learn that it, unlike hers (on which she and I had performed a similar experiment several years before), would not grow back. But the stuff about the “breast points”? That just sets off all sorts of alarms.
As disturbed as I am over the mere words “breast points”, which I suppose is doll-person jargon for a naughty word rhyming with “xipples”, I must say that I’m much more disturbed that those “points” have been tampered with. (Look!) This makes me think of horrible little boys who, we later learn, after they grow into horrifying little men convicted of unspeakable crimes, used to torture small animals in their back yards.
But I suppose that all really is well. I mean, after all, just like in real life, Midge’s clothes, like those of living dolls, hide evidence of her abuse! imperfections anyway!
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to put out a cigarette on my Betsy Wetsy!