I can barely contain my excitement. Even Tupperware, if it were so inclined to contain my excitement, would fail. This is not to say Tupperware is not a fine product. I am sure it is.
So why am I excited? Is it because I am going out tonight with my three chattiest, cattiest, hottest, immodest gal pals to a club so trendy and exclusive that even we won’t be allowed to swagger beyond the swagged velvet ropes and will have to satisfy ourselves (oooh!) with merely staggering by them hours later in a boozy floozy stupor and giving the doorman the finger instead of the handjob that would’ve gotten us through the door hours earlier?
It’s because today I finally ordered my camera! It will be here by mid-week. Which means that very soon I will be able to resume showing you how brilliant my life is rather than just telling you!
Try to contain yourselves.