Oh, confess. When you’re alone in the elevator and all you can think is that you just want to get where you’re going, now now NOW, come ON, and then some schmuck yells, “Wait! Hold the elevator!” and starts making his way-too-slow way toward the open doors, tell me you don’t press the CLOSE DOORS button, once, twice, thrice, fast fast FAST, muttering, “Come on come on, CLOSE!” and then as the doors close, pretend to be reaching for the OPEN DOORS button as you shout, “Sorry!” Tell me you don’t do it, and I’ll know you are a liar.